1000 Pageviews

In just over 2 months, the blog has reached 1,000 views.  I know that some of those are The Wife and some of them were me when I was just getting started and trying to figure out how this works, but hey... I think it's awesome that it's been read that many times.  I have only gotten a few comments over the course of the blog... mostly from The Wife and PipsyLou (the sister-in-law)... but I've had a few others too.  I know that there are people out there reading it, so thank you for taking the time to do so.... but you should leave comments because it's so exciting for me to see when I sign on!!!

Two days to the big move.  The moving company called today and confirmed an 8-8:30am move on Saturday.  It's early, but that will just give us more time for setting up the new house and getting settled in as much as possible.  Hopefully the forecast will be accurate and the ground will be dry enough for the kids to spend the day out in the yard... thus allowing us more time to unpack.  Either way though... the move is looming.

Moving Week

It has begun.

Last night, I packed up one of the cars with a few boxes and headed to the new house.  Luckily, we got the keys a few days early, so we are able to paint and get things ready for the big move on Saturday.  Granted, it was only one wall that needed painting, but that's something at least.  The first coat is on and I'll have to go over for a second coat in the next couple of days.  Leonard and Penny were super excited about their room still having a green wall when we move.  The thing that they are most excited for is the giant backyard.  Right now, they've been playing in a mostly concrete, 15' x 15' backyard.  The new yard is gigantic and it will give the kids the chance to run and run for hours.  The yard should provide some very restful nights for everyone, as the kids run themselves down to nothing.

The house is so much nicer than we even imagined it could be.  It's amazing how fresh and new everything looks with cleaned carpets and a fresh coat of paint on the interior.  We move Saturday morning and have our monthly meeting with Marty and Kate on Monday.  We fully intend on having the house look as if we've lived there for months by the time of our meeting.  We'll see how that goes... but we do have a plan of attack in place.

Hopefully we can get it set up and I will be able to post pictures of the new playroom and their new bedroom over the weekend.

Yep... He's a Biter

The temporary pardon that I wrote about last week has been revoked.  Leonard bit another kid at daycare yesterday.  For a child that has a vocabulary of several hundred words and speaks more clearly than most kids his age, biting should not be anywhere near anything that he ever does.  But it is.

Last night, Leonard's evening consisted of standing in his room alone (apparently sitting just didn't sound good?), coming down to eat, taking a bath, and going to bed.  There was no television and no playing.  He was also not entitled to books being read to him.  Penny enjoyed her evening though, cartoons, books and all.

Before he went to bed, we did their sticker charts.  Penny earned hers for having such a good day and she was very excited to see the sticker go on the chart.  Then came Leonard's turn.

The Wife: "Were you good at daycare?"

Leonard: "Yes"

Us (pretty much in unison): "You bit a kid... that's not good."

The Wife: "Were you nice to your sister?"

Leonard: "Yes"

The Wife: "I would agree with that.  You were nice to her.  Did you listen to us today?"

Leonard: "Yes"

The Wife: "When we told you not to bite anyone anymore and we talked about it... you didn't listen to that.  Did you use your words today?"

Leonard: "Yes"

The Wife: "No.  Those are the first words that you have said to us since you got home from daycare."

We then informed him that he would not be getting his sticker and that tomorrow (today) would have to be a better day if he wanted one.  Then it was off to bed.  No tears though, which was slightly unexpected.  When I went in to tuck Penny into bed, he was still awake, huffing and puffing in the angry way that he does.

This morning he was pretty talkative though, so I guess he has a short memory.  Which is good in the way that he doesn't continue to be surly days after things happen, but is bad in the way that he seems to ignore conversations we have had about his behavior.  The daycare said that they would be sure to keep a closer eye on him during the day to make sure that the biting doesn't occur again.  Hopefully this will be a short phase and we can get past it sooner, rather than later.

The Sticker Chart

I think I said a couple of days ago that we were going to start a sticker chart for Leonard and Penny to try to curb some behavior issues.  Things like arguing with each other, not talking to us, not following directions, biting and hitting are the reasons that we've decided to start it.  There are four things that they must be able to answer "yes" to, in order to get their daily sticker.  The questions that we ask at the end of the day are:

1. Were you nice to your sister/brother?

2. Were you well-behaved at daycare?

3. Did you listen to us?  (Follow directions, that kind of thing)

4. Did you use your words?

Today is day three.  Out of the last two days, so four stickers between the two of them, they have gotten two.  In two separate instances, they have each lost their stickers for tonight already.  While I wouldn't say it has improved their behavior, it seems to be going fairly well, as both of them have managed to maintain their composure when they haven't gotten stickers at night.  Up to this point, they had each missed one night.  We decided that cartoons or tv, after baths and before bed, was a bad idea and ends up causing more problems that it could ever be worth.  The "prizes" associated with the sticker chart are the reward of cartoons/tv on specific, predetermined nights and  the reward that will probably be the most exciting for them is that they will get to choose what activity we do for the weekend.  The options are going to be things like going to the park, the zoo or the farmstead... hopefully we will come up with more options at some point.  My guess is that it will be a few weeks before either of them earn the right to choose the activity, but they could surprise me.

Food = Love

Except that's not true at all. I know of a couple of people who seem to like that approach to life.

At visits yesterday, there were the following foods and drinks:

4 Bananas
Broccoli
Carrots
Chocolate Milk
Fruit Punch
Butterscotch Pudding
Chocolate Pudding
Grapes
Cheeseburgers
Blueberries
Pretzel Sticks
French Fries
Lemonade
Cheese
Ranch Dressing... for dipping everything

Aside from the unhealthy aspect of many of the items on this list, it seems like a decent list of snacks that would last a couple of weeks. Or just two hours worth of visits... that occur about an hour and a half after they finish breakfast at daycare. Their mom does a decent job, all things considering, as she generally brings them lunch, which is usually the hamburgers and fries and lemonade. The rest of that list comes during their visit with their dad. And they eat it. Obviously not all of the food gets eaten, but who could possibly eat that much food? Yesterday, The Wife and I decided that we are no longer accepting food to bring home from the visits. Leonard and Penny's parents can make the call as to whether or not they would like to throw it away or take it home with them. In the nine visits since they have come to us, we have easily thrown away $150 worth of food. And that might be a huge understatement. It could easily be over $200. Maybe when they realize that we don't need the food for the kids and they have to throw away unopened, perfectly good food, they'll stop bringing it. Somehow I doubt that.

Good news though... there weren't any more toys and useless crap sent this week. After last week's maracas and noisy magic wand thing, we are way past over that too.

Droppin' Bombs

F-bombs, that is.

Leonard learned a new word at daycare yesterday... how fantastic is that?  He apparently used it twice while he was there, once at lunch and once out on the playground.  Once his teacher told him that it was a bad word, he didn't say it again though, so I suppose that's something.  When The Wife first learned of this happening, she told the teacher that she didn't know where he learned it.  The teacher then re-assured her that there was another little boy that "knows all of the words" and that was where Leonard had heard it.  They're two years old, so I guess they really are like little sponges and/or parrots... learning and repeating everything they hear and see.  The real question is... did he use it in the correct context?  Hopefully we'll never have to find out.

Pardoned

At least partially.

Leonard was accused a couple of days ago of biting a little girl at daycare.  The Wife spoke to the teacher that saw the whole thing happen and even she wasn't sure that he bit the girl.  Immediately before "the bite", he was hugging the little girl.  Somehow, he made a motion that looked like he bit her.  She didn't have any reaction to whatever he did, so that leads the teacher who saw it to believe that there was no bite at all.  We jumped to the immediate reaction that it had happened because, even though we haven't seen it in our eight weeks with the kids, we were told when they first arrived that he had a history of biting.

No matter how it all went down, he eventually talked about it and understands that biting and hitting are both wrong.  He knows that is not how we treat our friends, or anyone else.  For now, we don't know what to think, as to whether or not it actually happened, but until it happens again (but hopefully never again), his name has been cleared from wrong-doing.

F - L - U

I know every year, at least one health organization (CDC, WHO, etc) comes out and says that "this year will be the worst flu season in 20 years" or something along those lines.  Generally, I like to take the "I'll believe it when I see it" attitude.  

Unfortunately, this will not be one of those years.  We got word from Marty that the kids are not allowed flu shots, as it apparently falls into the immunization category with their mom.  Obviously it's her right to decide that kind of thing, we just wish that she had chosen differently.  We'll be stocking up on orange juice for the winter months and pumping them full of as many foods that can help prevent sickness as much as we possibly can.  We've seen the statistics and as many as 20,000 kids, under age 5, are hospitalized every year with the flu.  Penny and Leonard go to daycare, where they are exposed to so many different kids and adults, that we have no idea where the winter months will take us.  We don't want them to end up sick at all, let alone in the hospital, so we will be doing our best to keep them healthy.  Maybe the vitamins and orange juice and everything else (we are allowed to try) will do the trick.

Redacted

I would like to, at least temporarily, redact my statements about how Penny is the happiest kid ever.  

I went to the baseball game last night with a friend and missed the fireworks at home.  I worked late to avoid driving the 15 or 20 minutes home just to drive 30 minutes back to the stadium.  After The Wife picked the kids up from daycare, they wanted to call me to let me know that they had a really good day and no one misbehaved as they had the previous day... with the biting and hitting.  I talked to her for a minute and all was well.  The evening was quite the opposite.  After dinner, The Wife told Penny that she needed to come in the kitchen and clean up the floor under her seat, as there were bits of pasta all over the place.  The idea of cleaning up did not sit well with Penny, so she FREAKED OUT.  She had a complete meltdown crying and yelling for no real reason... other than not wanting to do it.  In the end, Leonard stood back and watched as The Wife picked Penny up, carried her to her room (struggling all the way), and put her in bed.  Leonard then went with The Wife to watch a quick tv show before reading a book and going to bed.  After the fact, The Wife filled me in via text about what had happened, so I was up to speed on the whole thing.

This morning, the surliness continued from Penny.  As I was helping Leonard with his clothes, teeth brushing and hair, I asked her why she had behaved like that last night.  No answer.  I asked if that was going to keep happening.  No answer.  Once the shoes were on and we were ready to go, I strapped Leonard in and then went to her side of the car to fasten her seat.  She continued with her sullen face.  I asked if she was mad.  She shook her head "no".  I asked if she was sad.  Again the "no" head shake.  From the other side of the car, Leonard whispered, "I think she's mad".  He was just excited and happy to be the one that wasn't getting in trouble for a bad attitude probably.  We headed off to daycare, Penny in silence and Leonard yapping his trap all the way.  He even carried the new bag of diapers in to his teacher... as he sprinted for his classroom.  Penny continued to mope her way across the room to play with some other kids.

Tonight we will be starting their sticker charts.  We're hoping that rewarding them for their good behavior, rather than punishing them for less than good behavior, will help the situation.  

The Fantastic Day That Was

Not yesterday.

The Wife went to pick the kids up from daycare, as she normally does.  When she got there, she was informed by the director that Leonard had bitten another child and that Penny had been hitting other kids.  As far as we had known, everything had been going perfectly well at daycare and the kids were happy and well-behaved.  Obviously the hitting and biting were things that needed to be addressed with the kids, so we could try to convey the seriousness of their actions.  Generally when they get home, Leonard and Penny either watch cartoons for a little while or they play with their toys.  Yesterday, they got to do neither.  The Wife informed them that when they were ready to talk about what had happened, why it had happened, and why it was wrong, they could go play... but until then, they were not playing or doing anything else that could result in fun.  Penny was the first to start talking.  The Wife talked to her about how it wasn't nice to hit other kids, for any reason, and then they talked about what could be done differently next time (telling the other child how she feels, telling a teacher, etc).  Leonard was not so forthcoming with the talking and such.  Big shock to everyone, I'm sure.  When I got home, I found him standing just on the other side of his bedroom door.  I went in to attempt to get him to talk, but to no avail.  I then let him know that he needed to go sit on his bed until he was ready to talk or until he would answer my questions.  I told him how biting was not something he should ever do because he could get sick, he could make someone sick, or, if it continued, he would have to go to a different daycare potentially... without his sister.  I asked him one more time if he was going to talk to me about it and I got a head shake of "no".  Fifteen minutes later and dinner was ready, so he got to come out.

After Penny was done, since she's the fast eater, she played for a little while and then I decided that we might as well go take her bath.  Leonard was still eating.  About 45 minutes after starting dinner, Penny had bathed, brushed her teeth, gotten her hair brushed, and put her pajamas on... Leonard was still eating his cheeseburger.  For the record, eating his cheeseburger = wasting time to delay bath and bed.  While I was upstairs with Penny, The Wife went down to talk to Leonard about the biting.  He wouldn't talk, until she decided that the plate in front of him was a distraction and moved it, then he was an open book.  After their talk, he went back to his dinner.  I let it go until about 20 minutes before bedtime, then informed him that he was done.  If he was still hungry, he wouldn't be eating lima beans one at a time... almost an hour after he sat down.

When we found out about the biting and hitting, I sent an email to the play therapist and Marty.  We wanted them to know, since they are the two that would potentially be dealing with this, other than us.  I also called Marty just to let him know.  Marty thanked me for the call and the play therapist sent us an email back.  She told us that they daycare told her that Leonard had pushed another kid off of a bike and how he had been "irritable and disagreeable last week".  That was the first we had heard of that... from anyone.  I asked the daycare about it today when I dropped them off, but, other than a "we will let you know from now on", I didn't get much of an answer.

The play therapist also said that she's changing the times of her visits back to Tuesday afternoons instead of Monday mornings.  Her reasoning was that Leonard just started crying when he saw her and refused to come play with her and she thinks that he will at least see her in the afternoon.  She still hasn't figured out that he just doesn't like her I guess.  We've known for about six weeks.  Side note... she didn't even spell Penny's name correctly in the email.

Less Than Two Weeks

We get the keys to the new house next week and moving day is coming up.  The movers are coming on Saturday, but we have to go over and clean and paint to get it ready for moving all of our stuff in.  The kids are super excited about their new room, playroom and giant backyard.  We're excited to have somewhere that's big enough to stay for a while and a landlord that isn't going to ask for his house back in three months.

The play therapist visited the kids at daycare today.  We didn't hear anything about it, other than from the kids, so we don't exactly know what happened.  Penny told us the other day that the therapist came and saw them during their visits last week.  She was supposed to ask their mom about that special therapy thing that I can't remember the name of right now.  We have no idea if it got the ok or not... nor do we know if it happened today.  Perhaps she'll email us tomorrow... or Wednesday... or more likely, we'll never hear from her again.  Hard to say.

Is It Peanut Butter?

Oh Saturday mornings... how I wish we never saw you and just woke up sometime in the afternoon.

The little kids had bagels with peanut butter and The Kid had some cereal.  I realize this is not information that anyone really needs to have, but it will pay off in a minute.  After they were finished eating, the girls went to play and watch cartoons.  Leonard prefers to take him time eating and was still at the table.  When he finished his bagel, he came walking out of the kitchen with peanut butter on his face, hands and arms.  We got that all washed off, as we had a little laugh about how there was peanut butter everywhere.

While The Wife took Penny to gymnastics, with The Kid in tow, today, Leonard and I took the car to get the oil changed.  He sat very patiently in the chair next to me and alternated between watching them work through the window and reading Motor Trend magazine.  I was sure to call before we went, just so I would know what kind of wait that we'd be dealing with once we got there.  The guy said that there was no waiting, so of course we were there for almost two hours.  While we were sitting there, Leonard looked over at me and I noticed a little something in the corner of his eye, so I told him to look at me and I'd get it out.  He looked at me and very seriously said, "is it peanut butter?".  I guess when we said that it was everywhere after breakfast, he believed us.

So far it's looking like the plan for the afternoon is the zoo... since we didn't get to see half of it the last time we went.  The girls are at an open gym session where Penny does gymnastics and Leonard is taking a nap.  We should be off and running in about an hour.

What Exactly is Cow Milk?

Code for chocolate milk... that's what it is.

After visits on Fridays, where Leonard and Penny spend roughly two hours eating, I pick them up and take them back to daycare.  I always ask them what they had to eat for lunch and even though it's always the same (fast food), I pretend that I'm glad they ate.  Today there was a vast assortment of things listed when I asked... grapes, two bananas, cheese, pretzels, chicken nuggets, french fries, lemonade, and cow milk.  I informed them that all of the milk we drink is cow milk.  The two of them (or mostly Penny) insisted that we don't have cow milk at our house, but that their dad gets it at the grocery store.  Obviously, I asked how it was different than the milk we have at our house and I was told that it gets chocolate mixed in it.  So not only do they get stuffed full of terrible food for a couple of hours every Friday, they get chocolate milk to wash it all down.  How they don't both end up laying down in agony from the sugar assault on their systems, I do not understand.  Maybe it's just me, but I think if you're telling a small child that chocolate milk is "cow milk" and regular milk is not, perhaps the priority isn't on health at all and you should reconsider your choices.  We have never had a meal that the kids did not enjoy and we try to avoid sugary foods.  Anything that you put in front of them, they will eat.  The upside is that we do not have to deal with any picky eaters and have the freedom to make whatever we want for meals, knowing the kids will eat with no protests.  The downside is that they will do the same thing at visits... it's there, so they'll eat it.  As a special treat for having gotten her cavities filled, the kids' dad brought Penny some Oreo cookies.  You know... sugary chocolate cookies.  Wonder where those cavities ever came from in the first place.

I realize the banana and the grapes are healthy foods, but they only ate one banana between the two of them and the bag of grapes seems to be most of the way full.  When kids have all of those other options, fruit tends to take a backseat.  The thing about all of this food is that once we get it all home to take up space in our refrigerator, Leonard and Penny don't even ask for it.  I'm pretty sure that they're just eating it because that's what is put in front of them.

I realize now that this entry is more of a rambling rant about poor choices.  I wish there was something that we could do about it, but we have already voiced our concerns to Marty and, while he was understanding, there isn't much that he can do about it either.  Here's to hoping that they just get tired of eating all day every Friday.

Time Flies

It’s been eight weeks today since Leonard and Penny joined us.  It’s hard to see the subtle changes over the course of that time… but we know there have been quite a few. 

When they first got to our house, they were inseparable.   Obviously, that makes sense for kids who have just come into foster care and have been in three homes (their own, the respite, then ours) in less than five hours.  The first day of daycare, which was the Monday, following their Thursday arrival, was the first time that the two of them had ever been apart.  They were in the same building, just not the same classroom.  That was rough for two or three weeks in the beginning, with the crying and not wanting to be left there alone.  I should say that it was only ever rough for Leonard, as Penny adjusted after the first day (and never really cried).  Since then, things have definitely changed.  Last weekend, The Wife took Penny to her gymnastics and I took Leonard to get a haircut and to go grocery shopping and the only reaction from him was, “they’re going in that car and we’re going in this car”.  Separation anxiety has been eliminated.

Another thing that we were told when they first arrived was that they didn’t play well with other kids.  At our house, they didn’t have much choice.  The Kid was over for the weekend the day after they came to us and then our niece joined us for part of the day on Saturday.  We also took them to a birthday party for a friend's two year old that evening, where there were several other kids and a pool and a slide.  Penny told our friend that it was the best party ever.  Not to mention we had a friend of The Wife and her daughter over on Sunday of the same weekend.  There was no time for Leonard and Penny to not play with other kids.  We were curious as to how they’d react at daycare for the first time ever, but it went well, in reference to playing with kids.  Penny was in her classroom for about two minutes before she found a little boy to play with.  The progression on this aspect has been more subtle than the separation.  Over the Labor Day weekend, we went to a little family cookout and Leonard and Penny played with the nieces and nephew and they had a great time.  So… playing well with others… never really an issue, but they are much faster to respond to other kids being around than they may have been that first weekend.  Once again, not Penny, just Leonard.  He’s two though, so he gets a pass on being timid about these kinds of things.

The last big thing that we have noticed is still a work in progress.  The kids do not ask for help.  They will either not do whatever they need to ask about or they’ll just FREAK OUT.  Penny tends to take the approach of not doing whatever it is or she finds a way around asking the question.  Leonard prefers the freak out and then cry method.  In the last few days, since we had a talk about asking for things when they need them, Penny has been doing much better at asking for help.  On occasion, she won’t ask and I can calmly look at her and say, “what do you think you should do if you need help?” and she will quickly respond with, “will you help me with (insert whatever task here)?”, and then life goes on.  Leonard will struggle with something, like taking his shirt off for a bath, for about ten minutes.  Then he stands there looking at me with his pouty face.  We spent quite a few nights on just saying “please”.  That’s been going fairly well, so we added to it and are working on “help please”.  I would say we are having about a 75% success rate on his being specific about what he needs.  He has his moments, but like I said before… he’s two.

We’ve heard over and over from people that we are really lucky to have Leonard and Penny and how they are not a typical placement.  Everyone, from The Wife’s sister-in-law to the kids’ doctor, has told us.  Both Leonard and Penny are very well-behaved, intelligent kids that have just sort of caught a bad break in getting put in foster care.  Hopefully their parents will start working their plans and they will go back home, but for now, we are enjoying the time that we have with them and can’t wait to see what they will do or learn next.

Play Therapy

Sucks.  That's really all there is to it.

I'm pretty sure it has just been in our specific experience, but we haven't seen or heard the great results that it was going to provide.  Due to the details of the kids' case, I can't really put a lot in the description here, but basically nothing has happened in play therapy.  The therapist from the agency goes to daycare to spend about 30 minutes each with Leonard and Penny.  Supposedly, playing with the sand table that she brings with her every week helps to provide an outlet for the kids to express things that they otherwise would not.  We got an email today saying that neither of the kids have said anything to her or around her and that Leonard seems to be very timid when she's with them.  Our immediate reaction to the email was to say, "he doesn't like you because he can sense that you aren't a very nice person".  I went with something along the lines of how his nap is from noon to 2:30 (or later) every day.  From the beginning, we told her that was during naptime and her 2 o'clock suggestion of when to see them was going to be rough for them.  Even when Leonard wants to talk to someone, he doesn't start jabbering away when he wakes up from a nap.  Apparently she got the message, as we got an email back saying that she would move the appointment to either 10am or 11am.  Well... if they take naps at noon, perhaps they eat lunch before that?  Once again, I informed her of the schedule and the fact that they eat around 11:15am every day and the 11am timeslot would not work.  She said that she would start going to see them at 10am.  Had she just listened to us about six weeks ago, this would not have been an issue today.

The other thing that she suggested was something called EMDR.  There's a whole website that she told us to look at in case we needed more information.  Of course, the decision is not ours to make as to whether or not they will do the "treatment".  The therapist said that she will go to the visit on Friday and talk to their mom about it.  All we can do is hope that she says no.  Unfortunately, I believe the chances of her saying no on this one are about as good as our chances of getting a yes to flu shots for the kids.

Are They Just Hoping for the Best?

There was one big thing that I completely left out of last night’s recap of our meeting.  Neither of Leonard and Penny’s parents are working their plans.  Marty said that he doesn’t know exactly why, but it’s not getting done.  That will just be another thing that could potentially push the date back for when the kids would be leaving us.  Obviously, if we’re planning for a long placement anyway, a few months of delay on starting their plans isn’t going to affect us.  When court rolls around in December, they will more than likely just be told that they need to start the plans if they are hoping to get the kids back.  We are fairly certain that, once they leave us, Leonard and Penny will not come back into care.  We never considered that their parents would not be making every effort to get them back.  Both parents are super nice and it seems like they really miss the kids and enjoy seeing them every week at visits.  Neither one of them has skipped or even tried to reschedule or cancel a visit. 

In the end, we just feel really bad for the kids, but I suppose there’s a reason that they’re with us.

Tonight's Meeting

Not a lot of new information.  The kids' caseworker, Marty, is going to do his best to convince the parents that it is in the best interest of the kids to have flu shots.  Neither he, nor our FSC, Kate, thought that getting permission to dress Leonard and Penny up for Halloween would be an issue.  Just to be safe, Marty's going to check.

While Penny is always outgoing and personable when new people come around, Leonard has generally been quite the opposite.  He prefers to either sit on the stairs just out of sight or spontaneously burst into tears for no apparent reason.  Tonight he alternated between sitting on the couch next to The Wife and running around the house with his sister.  Marty and Kate were both pleasantly surprised to see how much he has changed in the last month since we had a meeting.

Penny informed them that she had started gymnastics last week and they both looked shocked.  We just thought that she needed an activity, so that was the one we picked.  We wanted her to be able to be active and socialize, so gymnastics seemed like a good fit.  Penny ran upstairs and brought down her leotard to show them.  She was super proud of it.

Eventually we got to talking about the excessive amounts of stuff they send home with us every week from visits.  Marty mentioned that he had noticed a lot of things being sent with us and wanted to know if he should say anything about it.  In less than two months, we have received numerous things that we need, as well as many that no one needs.  Their mom bought them each a pair of shoes, in addition to the shoes that she sent.  And then she sent about 30 pairs of socks for each kid, many of which were brand new in bags.  She has also provided us enough clothes for the cooler months that, between that and what we already had, Penny will never be seen in the same outfit twice.  We have gotten a kid-size suitcase of toys from their dad as well.  Originally, he provided a lot of the clothes that were sent after they got to our house.  We also seem to end up with a small supply of groceries for the weekends.  It started as a bunch of junk food... cookies, popcorn, etc.  Since then, it has made the transition to healthier options like blueberries and broccoli and/or carrots with ranch.  Those things all seem to come from their dad.  Their mom brings them lunch every week during their visit.  All but once it has been fast food.  The other time, it was sandwiches and fruit that she had made and brought with her.  We were hopeful after that one that the non-fast food trend would continue... that didn't work out though.  Marty sort of gave us the eye roll when we were talking about the fast food and everything, like he wished that he could do something about it, but couldn't.  The upside is that since we don't eat out, that's the only fast food that they're getting.  Generally, the food all ends up getting thrown away, just because we have meals planned out a week in advance and the kids are at daycare for breakfast and lunch during the week.  Occasionally, we've used it as a side dish to their regular dinner, but how many things do blueberries really go with?

We talked about how they were doing with daycare and sleeping and everything else, but like I said, nothing super new to report.  Marty still thinks they'll be with us for a long time and even with the mention of Leonard's birthday in April, he didn't seem real concerned that they would be anywhere but with us.

I'm sure there was more and it will occur to me in the middle of the night that I left something out, but that will just leave me something to write tomorrow.

Monthly Meeting #2

On the agenda for this evening’s meeting… Halloween and flu shots.

When The Wife first asked Penny about dressing up for Halloween, she didn’t seem to understand what that even meant.  We don’t want to step on any toes, religious or otherwise, so we will be asking permission from the kids’ parents to dress them up and take them out on Halloween.  I don’t think it will be a big deal, because maybe they were just too young in previous years, as she would have just turned 3 and he would only have been 18 months last year.  But we’ll see.

Flu shots are the bigger issue this time around.  We already know that the kids are un-vaccinated… but we’re hoping that the flu shot will not be the same.  The Wife and I will be getting ours soon enough, but it’s much more important for little kids to get it.  Leonard and Penny go to daycare and are around so many other kids every day, it’s in the best interest of everyone to get a flu shot.  That obviously doesn’t mean that it will happen, or that the other kids at daycare will get them, but the flu can get bad.  It can get really bad for kids Leonard’s age.  Having a sick little kid that is miserable is bad enough… but having a sick little kid in the hospital would be even worse.

My guess is that we’ll get permission for Halloween, but not flu shots… which is too bad really.  Don’t get me wrong, while I think chicken pox is a rite of passage for kids, I do not feel the same about polio.

Is It Over Yet?

Man these two are a lot for an entire day. 

Leonard had his jersey on and Penny had her cheerleading outfit on earlier this afternoon before the game started and all they did was yell and cheer.  And about fifteen minutes later, the game actually started.  While he has a pretty good grasp on the way that baseball works, he has no idea whatsoever how or what football is.  Everytime they ran a play, he just stared at the screen and yelled, "Look!  Those guys are all falling down!".  I'm fairly certain that he had no idea there was even a ball involved in the game.  The network switched to show some highlights from another game at one point and during the touchdown celebration that was on, Leonard looked at me and said, "They're hugging him!".  They lost interest about 30 minutes into the game.

Not much else went on today.  The Wife and I relocated everything to one side of the basement, so when moving day comes, it's a little more condensed for the movers.  We determined that, until Leonard informs us that he needs to go to the bathroom, he is not ready for underwear.  He does really well when we send him to the bathroom every 45 minutes, but we both agree that is not potty trained in the least.  It would be nice to have two potty trained kids, but that's probably asking a lot out of a 2.5 year old.

In other news... we think that once we move to the new house, since the windows are big enough to be licensed for kids in all of the bedrooms, we're going to call and say that we're open to taking a baby.  We have a daycare and we have a crib.  AND WE HAVE ALL KINDS OF CUTE BABY THINGS THAT WE HAVEN'T GOTTEN TO USE YET.  We know that Leonard and Penny will, most likely, be with us into next summer, but we feel as though we are ready to take on a third kid.  Who knows if that will work out... but we're sure gonna try.

The View from the Couch

Is of a lot of stuff, to be honest.  We have 17 days until we can move stuff to the new house and 20 days until the movers are coming.  We have a lot of stuff.  We have a lot more stuff than we did when we moved in here three months ago... thank you Ikea.  When we packed the last house, it was just the two of us and we basically used the same four glasses and the same four plates to eat all of our meals.  We just spent a lot more time than normal washing dishes.  We also didn't have a lot of our stuff out on display, since the house had to be staged to sell.  Adding a two and three year old into the mix is definitely going to make the last few days of packing much more involved.  We could always plop them down in front of the television for entertainment for the last few days, but A) that only holds their attention for so long and B) that's not really the way we want them to be entertained.  This morning, I gave them the choice of television or just playing.  They chose playing... so television... not really a big thing for them.

We don't have a lot planned for today... mostly lounging and watching some football... and packing.  I cannot express to you how much I dislike packing.  We have so much extra stuff now, there's no way we'll have enough boxes.  I can already see a trip to Home Depot in my future for today.  On the other hand... I dislike this house even more.  It seemed like such a good place when we found it.  Not amazing by any means, but sufficient and it was available when we needed it.  I think they made a movie about this house about twenty five years ago... it's "The Money Pit".  In the three months that we have lived here, we've had a broken dishwasher, washer, dryer, garbage disposal and now a sink.  The sink, we have determined, will remain that way and be the owner's problem when he moves back in.  It's not worth the effort to call someone and the impending ten day wait for someone to actually come fix it.

All in all, I guess we should do some packing... but that doesn't mean that I have to want to pack.

Cavities, Gymnastics, Haircuts, Oh My!!

Penny's cavities were succesfully filled yesterday.  The dentist decided that the gas would be enough and they were going to do it without any shots.  As I was getting the text updates from The Wife, we were both freaking out a little at that decision by the dentist.  Penny stayed strong though... she didn't even flinch.  She opened and closed her mouth when they told her to and the entire process was about 45 minutes, which included the gas being administered.  After they were done with her fillings, they told The Wife to just let her relax for a while and then they could go.  Well... Penny popped right up and was ready to go home.

We decided that Penny needed an activity.  We also decided that gymnastics should be that activity.  This was a decision that was made at about 10am on Friday morning.  By 11am, she was enrolled in a class and at 9am today, she was at the gym.  I guess we can attribute that to the "go hard or go home" attitude we take on things.  We weren't just going to sit around and talk about her going to gymnastics... we were going to make sure she was IN a class.  While it's a beginner class, Penny still gets to work on the equipment, including the bars (just the lower one), balance beam, springboard, and the "jumpoline" (as said by Penny).  Yeah... it's a trampoline... but who could correct something that cute, right?  She is very much looking forward to next week's class and is hoping that The Kid will go to watch her, since she'll be at our house for the weekend.

Today marked Leonard's first haircut since joining us.  We asked permission a couple of weeks ago from the parents and yesterday we received the go ahead from the kids' case manager.  It was nearing mullet status in the back and The Wife had to brush out a tangle this morning. So yeah... it was time.  Due to Penny's gymnastics class and The Wife being the one to take her, I got to be in charge of the haircut.  We went to a place that is geared toward kids, tvs playing cartoons and chairs that are little cars.  Leonard is always a little shy, especially around new adults, but he held strong today.  There was a much younger little boy that was screaming his head off and Leonard was mostly concerned with that.  He was very still the entire time and was perfectly fine with both the scissors and the razor.  It's not like it was his first haircut or anything, but a member of their family is usually the one doing their hair, so we were worried about him freaking out.

Naps are occurring as I type... hopefully all will be just as well after the naps as it was before them.  Big plans for the library and picking up an old paycheck of mine for the afternoon/evening.  Windows are all open and the beef stew for dinner tonight and the chili for the real opening day of the NFL season tomorrow are cooking in the kitchen.  Just a relaxing weekend... minus the packing of course.

Things Have to Get Better... Right?

Today was another rough day for The Wife.  She had the unlucky draw of staying home with sick Leonard, as I am out of PTO due to the new job and week of vacation a month ago.
It all started when Penny and I came to say goodbye to The Wife and Leonard.  He did not take the news that we were leaving without him to go to daycare very well.  He cried for a few minutes and then got to go sit in his room.  He cried while she put him in a diaper, rather than having a crying related accident in underwear.  Then he kept laying in the middle of his floor crying for quite a while.

When I got home from work, he was sitting on the couch watching cartoons.  I asked him if he was wearing a diaper or underwear and he just stared at me.  After I asked again and got no response, he got to sit at the kitchen table alone to think about his answer.  He still didn't want to answer a few minutes later, so up to his room he went.

One of our goals since the kids have gotten here is having them ask for help.  For the most part, Penny asks for things or help.... minus the shoe incident yesterday.  Leonard doesn't talk.  He just gets real quiet.  For about a week, the battle was his shirt at bathtime.  He could take his shorts and diaper off, but would just stand there staring at me with his shirt on.  After a few nights, he finally started saying "please".  It's not asking for help, but it's at least acknowledging that he needs something.  Tonight was more of the same... generally speaking at least.  First it was the question when I got home, then at dinner, after Penny asked for barbeque sauce and a fork for her chicken (they already had spoons for corn), Leonard just stared at me.  He ate all of his corn and then he just kept looking at me.  I asked him if he was done and he sort of gave an "I don't know" shrug.  I'm pretty sure that he wanted some of the barbeque sauce or maybe a fork, but I guess we'll never really know.  He managed to eat some of his chicken with the spoon, so I'm sure he was plenty full (half a can of corn will have that effect), but nonetheless... he did not say the words.

Tomorrow could be another rough one.  Hard to say at this point.  Penny will be visiting the dentist to get those four cavities filled.  She gets the laughing gas and a shot, so hopefully that will help her with the pain, but it still might be a bad evening.  Leonard will be going back to daycare after their visits alone, which will remain a secret to him until he realizes it.  If he does.  Hopefully the happiness of being back at daycare after missing a day will overwhelm him and his sister not being in the same building will go unnoticed.

An Eventful Day

Morning meltdown, courtesy of Penny.

Underwear to daycare for the first time for Leonard.

A call from daycare about a rash that Leonard had.

And a trip to the doctor to find out that it's strep throat... with a touch of pinkeye.

I didn't have to deal directly with any of the trials and tribulations of the day, but it was a no good, very bad day for The Wife. 

The morning meltdown was related to something about shoes.  Both kids have had issues with asking for help since they came to our house.  It was understandable for Leonard, since he's 2... but still not excusable.  Penny generally asks for help, but this morning she decided to not ask for help with her tennis shoes.  The Wife gave her a few minutes, but then it came down to time to leave or they would be late to daycare, in turn making her late for work.  When she wouldn't ask for help and it was time to go, The Wife took the socks off of Penny's feet and gave her some slip on (non-sock requiring) shoes to wear.  Penny took this very poorly and started bawling.  And when Leonard sees his big sister crying, he gets upset and cries.  Luckily, "stop crying" works on him.

We had three changes of underwear and shorts packed and ready to take to daycare today.  Leonard really wanted to wear underwear and no diaper, so we let him.  He had done so well over the weekend, we really wanted to see him make it through a full day without us telling him to go to the bathroom every 30 minutes or so.  He was at daycare for 6 hours, with 4 successful trips to the bathroom... well... three successful trips and one time he just didn't have to go.  He wore them all evening and we changed him into a diaper for bedtime  It's gonna be a while on the bedtime underwear... man that kid pees a lot at night.

The call was because of a rash, but as it turns out, it's a reaction to strep throat.  I have a feeling that he will thoroughly enjoy his day tomorrow.  Leonard will be staying home from daycare, since he will be contagious for the first 24 hours on medicine.  He seems to be in really good spirits about the whole thing.  According to what The Wife has said about the day, he was in a very good mood and smiling and talkative for the entire afternoon.  I have to assume that he just isn't used to the one on one attention, since he's the little brother.  The doctor even ran the strep test on him twice and he took it like a champ.  Ten days of medicine and he'll be like new.

All in all, the eventful day turned out somewhat ok.  I'm not sure that The Wife would agree... but as somewhat of an outsider, it looks like it to me.

Birthday Planning and Potty Training

Yeah... so The Wife and I talked about it today and we pretty much already decided on what we'll be getting Penny for her birthday in October.  Since we're moving, we have plenty of room to have everyone over to celebrate and hopefully the weather will cooperate so all of the kids can play in the backyard.  We're thinking that it's gonna be an afternoon of appetizers and small foods... so the kids can have more time to run themselves ragged.  When we had The Kid's birthday a few weeks ago, everyone didn't arrive until 6pm or so, and we were pushing bedtime for the little ones by the time dinner was being finished.

Potty training from the holiday weekend went really well.  Like surprisingly well.  Leonard made it through the whole day Sunday and most of the day on Monday wearing underwear (including the cookout Sunday at The Wife's parents' house and a trip to the farmstead for a couple of hours).  The only reason he didn't finish out the day yesterday was that he had a two year old tantrum about not being allowed to bring a ball home that belonged to another kid, so we decided that we didn't want a tantrum related accident on our hands.  Leonard informed The Wife that he would like to wear his underwear to daycare tomorrow.  When I got home and learned of this idea, I said, "I heard you want to wear underwear to daycare tomorrow?" and his response was, "I am.".  I guess that answered my question... although I'm not entirely sure he knew it was a question.  His teachers are going to be super surprised tomorrow.  We're hoping for minimal accidents while he's there.  Surely there will be a couple over the next few days... but we'll take it.

Not much else to say for now... but as I find myself on the couch watching Dora, I have to wonder... how does Swiper not speak Spanish?  He spends all of his time stealing from people who speak the language and he hasn't picked up any of it?  Seems a little far fetched for me.

Pictures As Promised



The calmest group of five children ever.



The Wife's mom dancing with Penny

Leonard and the littlest niece sharing some coloring time.

Labor Day and Whatnot

Alright... back in action on the blogging.  I hope.  Between the sickness that plagued our house for a couple of weeks and the recent news from the landlord that we needed to move out by the end of September, the blog has not been a major priority.

We found a place to live that is only 2.8 miles from where we live now, so Leonard and Penny get to keep going to the same daycare and it doesn't add a whole lot of driving time or mileage.  For the first time since living with my parents... about fourteen years ago... I have a real house to live in.  I have lived in a duplex and a few townhomes in that time, but it's an actual house this time.  And I think that I'm looking forward to doing yardwork and mowing and such.  We're renting, so the big stuff is still up to the landlord, but we can finally plant our garden and (attempt to) grow our own herbs and maybe even some vegetables.  The kids will still be sharing a room, but that's the way they seem to like things.  We'll have a playroom that won't take up our living space or be in the way of a dining room, which is much like now, and sort of hard to find in our price range.  Moving day is the 29th.  I took Leonard and Penny by the new house yesterday, just to show them what it looked like.  They didn't really seem all that interested until I informed them of the massive backyard where they can play baseball and hopefully play in the snow this winter.  After that, they talked about it for a good ten or fifteen minutes.

Yesterday, Leonard decided that he was over this whole wearing diapers thing.  He's two and a half, so we'll say that we were cautiously optimistic.  That's not entirely true.  We had very little confidence.  When he woke up this morning, I asked if he was ready for a new diaper, he said, "no, underpants".  So I obliged, thinking that would last all of an hour.  That was at 7:30am.  It's now 6:40pm and he's still going strong.  The doubts that we had up to this point were mostly based on the fact that we had never heard him express a need to go to the bathroom.  For now, we're calling eleven hours into underwear a success, but we are still expecting obvious setbacks.  Over the course of the last two hours or so, he has even told me that he needed to go twice.  During bathtime, we talked about how if he could do this well again tomorrow, that we would only need diapers at naptime and bedtime and he could start wearing underwear to daycare.  Currently, he is wearing dinosaur underwear and he informed me that he would like to wear those tomorrow as well.

We went to The Wife's parents' house today for an end of summer Labor Day weekend cookout.  The Wife's brother and sister-in-law and their three kids were over and it was the calmest house to have five kids, age seven and under, ever.  Leonard played and colored with our little niece, who just turned one in June.  Penny played with the oldest niece, who is seven and just started 2nd grade.  For a while, Leonard, Penny and the oldest of theirs played with the tee ball set that we got not too long ago.  For a two and three year old, they can really make some solid contact with the bat and ball.  And no one got beaten or chased with a bat... so that was awesome too.  We had some very, very sweaty kids after a short time, so we went inside to play and wait for the food to be done.  These two are such good eaters.  They had some goldfish crackers and raw green peppers to tide them over until lunch was ready.  Leonard sat at the table patiently waiting and eating some macaroni & cheese, as he was awaiting the hamburgers that were cooking.  The other kids had hotdogs that were done first.  When they finished, they got up and went to play.  Leonard stayed.  He sat at the kitchen table and finished his chips, macaroni & cheese, cheeseburger, and fruit, while he chatted with The Wife's mom and dad and grandmother.  This, coming from the kid that just started crying for no reason a couple of weeks ago with the same people.  It's been an amazing and shocking transformation.

The Wife is currently editing pictures, so I will be sure to post what I can later tonight.